Innocence

We can all learn alot from little children.. they forgive and forget quickly, they do not hold grudges, they are honest, but most of all the greatest thing we can learn from our precious children is how to love. They love A LOT, they love everyone, and they love hard. Its so hard for us as adults to love one another we always find some reason to not love someone fully either because you do not approve of their lifestyle or they have hurt you and you cant let it go. I shared a story in my bible study this past week as were talking about loving one another as Christ loves each and every one of us about my adorable little 2 (tomorrow OMG) year old. We were having brunch with my mom and she greeted everyone as they walked in and as we walked in. Hello! Hi! *wave*. As we went to leave and walk out the door Buttercup said "bye" and waved and she got a unanimous "bye" from those who were there and she said "I love you!" Just as freely as could be and she had no reason not to love these strangers. They had not hurt her or were not hurting her. I believe she sincerely loves EVERYONE! What if.. we ALL loved each other as much as she loves? What an amazing planet this would be. Of course we are human and there are things in our minds and our hearts we are unable to let go (of this I am guilty of too) and its so hard to love the people we think are "unlovable". In the right margin of my blog there are some rules and regulations to live by. A foundation on what we as CHILDREN of God would have us live off of them. I cannot list ALL of them but there is a book you can read as guidelines for life. If you so choose to walk that path. Of course if you do not know what I am talking about I am talking about the Bible. Please do not think my intentions are to get on here and blog your brains out and "preach" to you but I am just simply sharing my thoughts on things and my testimony on the amazing things God can do if you trust in him. Two of the things that stand out in my mind that are AMAZING works of God is this day...

My husband and his unit (minus two) returned safely home to their families. Many soldiers are returning home to their families and what amazing work that is. Imagine if God just said well I am going to let you all handle it. We would all be in trouble. Another story is an amazing little boy that I have the amazing pleasure of knowing.

Dear sweet Tony!! I love this boy with all my heart. He has such imaginable strength and courage and so does his family. As a mother I cannot imagine having a child with a disability... I do not like this word because let me tell you this precious little boy does not act by any means disabled. Still my heart melts when I see him and hey said "Hey Ms. Jennifer". One day I hope to post their story. His mother has written an amazing story about both of their struggles and trials and even successes in his life. This precious little face has what you call Moebius Syndrome which you can read about HERE!! But when I first met Tony he had a feeding tube in could not walk and could say very few words. Now here he is in his karate photo standing and talking and walking like nothing is holding him back. How amazing. God has given doctors and therapists the knowledge to help this little man, given him and his family and friends the strength to not give up. What an amazing little boy.. back to my title.. his mommy posted this on her facebook a little bit ago and I wanted to share because its so precious how innocent our children are... "Tony's innocence showed this morning at WH on GA ave. Man walks in with a long white beard and Tony immediately asks, 'Are you God?!' Really, really loud! Haha. Didnt even go for Santa first which would be most kids, he went for God, such innocence. Love it :-)" So cute!! I love that family so much! Anyways! I just wanted to share some thoughts going through my head today! Hope you all have a great day! Tomorrow is Firday for all you workers!! Almost the weekend!! Hope yall have a great evening. Im off to my inlaws for some yummy food and togetherness!

Content...

So I ran across this article on my facebook and thought I would share...

A while back, at the entrance of a gym, there was a picture of a very thin and beautiful woman. The caption was "This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?" 

The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way:

 "Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness.

They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns. They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia.

They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds. They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires.

 Mermaids do not exist.

 But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish?

They would have no sex life and could not bear children.

Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad.

And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side?

 Without a doubt, I'd rather be a whale.

 At a time when the media tells us that only thin is beautiful, I prefer to eat ice cream with my kids, to have dinner with my husband, to eat and drink and have fun with my friends.

 We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn't enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies.

We are not fat, we are greatly cultivated.

Every time I see my curves in the mirror, I tell myself: "How amazing am I ?! "

 (The girl on the picture is French model Tara Lynn)

In todays society it is difficult for a woman to be content with anything nowadays.. our family, our life, our career and even our self esteem. I struggle with my weight endlessly and I can do more about it but it would take away from more important things in life. We all become so wrapped up in wanting something more we dont bask in the blessings that we already have whether it be working to make more money to buy more things.. Things are just THINGS and they are easily thrown away after they wear out... family and time together and memories cannot be thrown away. The "idea" society has about peoples image is too far fetched we are all made differently. Im not always comfortable in this skin but I am content.. I have the love of an amazing man and children who love me no matter what I look like! Remember be content with what you do have... soak in all the amazing blessings God has given you and stop trying to get more.. Sometimes more isnt always a good thing. Just some food for thought!! Hope everyone has a great day!

Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you."Hebrews 13:5

All my love

Being a Christian...

I am not sure but I am truly hoping you all have noticed an attitude change in me. I really hope you have because I feel a change in my heart... It has not been easy and I am sure it will continue to be a struggle within me. I have been going to a bible study on tuesdays and it has opened my eyes and convicted me of many things I have done and should have done different or not at all and things maybe I should have done. If there are ones in the past I am truly sorry from deep within my heart I am asking your forgiveness. I am not going into personal things but I guess all I can say is if you feel as though I have done something to upset you I am truly and dearly sorry. Its so hard to ask forgiveness. Any prideful person can tell you that. You dont apologize for looking like the weaker person or you just dont want to give in to the grudge or the hatred you may have in your heart. Its definitely hard to love an unlovable person.. well maybe someone YOU think is unlovable. I have spent so many years holding onto things that people have done or said that have hurt me that it has kept me from true happiness in my soul. To include myself. My point of this whole blog is... if something were to happen to me tomorrow I want to know that I left with a good relationship with everyone behind. Sure its hard to have a perfect relationship with anyone but I want to go to sleep at night with the peace in my heart that I spoke the words of love from my heart and not hatred because I was holding a grudge. I love my family and friends with all my heart and those who WERE my friends still have a very special place in my heart. Were coming up on an old friend of mines wedding and I will not be attending but I thought of this beautiful couple as I looked through my daughters baby book. There they were sitting in the hospital room holding her and talking to her... He was a very prominent person in my childrens lives until recently and it hurts that they no longer are but I dont hate them... I dont hate anyone... I may not love them ( Like I SHOULD) but one day we will hopefully get passed all of this... point is I love them very much and of course wish them the best.. I could name quite a few people that I dont have the best relationship with (and wish I did) but they stick out in my mind because I have seen their picture recently. Anyways! I am sorry I am all over the place but I am trying to come into my faith as a complete Christian and my husband is right beside me and its a breath of fresh air and relief knowing that in this human life I live with my husband will continue beyond the years unto forever. That my friends is a beautiful thing! With all my love in Christ

Courageous

What an amazing weekend I had. I cannot even begin to emphasize how amazing it was and how I am so grateful for my wonderful life. So Friday we went grocery shopping (ok so THAT part was not so great) but we did pick up the new Transformers movie. After we got back home and settled in and put up groceries we had dinner and baths. The littlest went to bed and we let the older two stay up and watch Transformers. Good movie.. Lots of action.. Definitely a guy movie. Im glad we bought it though because I will watch it again. Saturday morning I got up and took some bridal portraits of a good friend of mine. They turned out good! I dont think they were GREAT (on my part) but I am my own worst critic. I just hope she loves them! Shes a very beautiful woman inside and out and she is a beautiful bride. I cannot wait until this weekend to take pics at her wedding. After the bridal pics I came home had lunch took a little nap with the babies and then hubby and I took the kiddos to the church (because they are amazing and offered babysitting for the kids) so we could go see the new movie Courageous. I cannot begin to explain how amazing that movie is. All I can say is if you have children or grandchildren, want to have children, and parents take your children to see this movie. It will NOT dissappoint. It is a MUST see! As parents sometimes we take advantage of this amazing blessing of having children for granted and well this movie definitely puts things into perspective and shows the importance of a "father" in a childs life.  http://www.courageousthemovie.com/  Please check it out! I BEG YOU! Anyways so back home put kiddos to bed grabbed a bit to eat and my mom came over and we watched Passion of The Christ. I had seen it before and lemme tell ya that is a movie that a person can only watch once. James had never seen it so I gritted my teeth and watched again with him. Again another great movie if you have not seen it I encourage you to see it . Sunday morning we went to church. Have I mentioned I love my church.. Shame on me for not going more often until now. Came home had lunch took naps with the kiddos and then woke up had a big dinner of fried chicken with my mom and stepdad and then bathed the kiddos and got everything ready for another crazy week! So all in all it was GREAT! Sunday coming we start the bible study that goes along with the movie Courageous and I am really looking forward to it. Well I hope everyone has had a wonderful weekend and may God bless your families just as he has mine! With all my love!

Life Aint Always Beautiful

So as I trudge on through these murky waters of life nowadays unaware of what the future holds for any of us I try to be optimistic. Its hard to be happy and optimistic all the time but its what my husband and my children need right now. Someone to come home to with a smile on their face... My bible study has been so convicting and when you begin to realize ALL the things in your life that you need to change in order to feel completely happy in the inside.. I look at myself and thing wow.. I need alot of work. I have tried to stop trying to change other people.. that hasnt been easy either... But the hardest part for me is to love people who have hurt me or my family members unconditionally and unyielding and SHOW it.. This week in my bible study we are learning to replace a critical attitude with love... meh.. its harder than you think and when I read this and evaluate my life in the past it hurts.. I missed out on so much HAPPY in my life because I held grudges and was critical and not letting God take care of the things he wants to. I am getting better letting things go and just being content and happy with everything God has blessed me with. Anyways speaking of blessings Big Papa does not have to have surgery... well not at this point in time anyways. Doc is hoping things get better if it does not then surgery will be possible but until then hes going to continue physical therapy and go through some kind of pain management... Whether it be shots or something different.. I am not sure what. So though a weight has been lifted as far as surgery we are still in the unknown of what the Army is going to do with him now but I have to assume it will be in his best interest. There are so many other things I can write about and talk about and maybe it will help others understand the depths of the pain and dealings that a soldier has to go through when they return from a deployment.. but again I am not sure my husband would like me to freely share. Lets just say they see alot.. unimaginable things that many of us will NEVER see in our lifetimes and wish our precious children will never have to see. Its hard to deal with and let go sometimes.. And if affects some more than others but with supportive family and friends it makes life much easier and LOTS and LOTS of praying.  I hope everyone has had a great week. We have a fun weekend planned. I have some Bridal Portraits I am shooting tomorrow and hubby and I are going to watch Courageous and then its onto Sunday for church (which I can honestly say I am looking forward to).

"Struggles makes me stronger And the changes make me wise And happiness has its own way of takin' its sweet time   Life aint always beautiful Tears will fall sometimes Life aint always beautiful But it's a beautiful ride."

Life Happens....

Whether you want it to or not. I am not sure what to say or how to say it... but I have been a way from blogging for a while.. been trying to find my niche in this thing I call life. I am a wife and a mother of that I am sure but I have been working on my faith and my place with the Lord and also my place in the Army. Sure Big Papa is National Guard but right now he is active military with a wounded warrior unit here. Its unnerving to think that he has been there for quite sometime and had very FEW people from his actual unit check on him. (Unless they were "ordered" to). Its actually very sad if I do say so myself, and hes not the only one from the unit who has not been checked in on. Anyways, I am not sure to the extent my husband is comfortable talking about things but I know I can tell you this... deployment does NOT end when they come home... it CHANGES. There are so many things to learn about each other and have to work through. Someone told me however long they are gone.. that is the shortest amount of time it will take to feel somewhat "normal" together again. Big Papa has 3 bulging disks one of which is pushing on his spinal nerve roots in his lower back from an accident in Afghanistan. He did see the medics there which they told him he has muscle spasms (because he did not want to go to Germany to have it further checked out and yes I yelled at him for being a prideful man). He did not want to leave his unit unless he absolutely had to. My husband is a phenomenal man as is many of the men and women in our armed forces. He deals with the pain of his back and stress of still providing for his family at the same time a stress I could never imagine. He is currently going through physical therapy until a spinal surgeon decides if he is a good candidate for back surgery. At the rate it seems he is not getting better and he is getting worse so it is looking like surgery will be taken into serious consideration. With that comes more stress but we will deal with that when the situation arrives. 24 years old and having to have lower back surgery and thinking about things most of us do not think about until we are much older and have grandchildren. The immense responsibility of a soldier and a husband and a father all in one is unmatched. I cannot even begin to relate to him... all I can do from here is support him. It has not been an easy road so far and I do not foresee it getting any easier either. That takes me into a happier note. We have gotten more involved in church and I think that it has helped greatly. I have been attending bible study on Tuesdays with my mom for about 6 weeks now. "Lord Change My Attitude" by James MacDonald. AMAZING bible study. I am truly pleased with the workings it has done in my heart and the learning to accept and replace negative and sinful attitudes with more positive and God honoring ones and to be content with how much or how little I have. It has not been easy. I will be the first one to admit I need an attitude adjustment and that it has not and will not be easy. Its hard to swallow when you KNOW the one who needs to change to make your life better is YOU. No one else can make your life what you want it... and you can not use others to make your life what you want it... It has to start from the inside. So all in all.. with everything that is going on my husband and I are learning to walk closer with the Lord and in doing that we are walking closer to one another. How amazing when you look in the right direction for answers and uplifting your life just kinda falls into place. I hope everyone is having a wonderful day and I promise I will try to do BETTER at my blogging and keeping you all updated. And if you read feel free to let me know you are reading! Its nice to see who is really involved.

 "Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever! Now our knowledge is partial and incomplete, and even the gift of prophecy reveals only part of the whole picture! But when full understanding comes, these partial things will become useless." 

(1 Corinthians 13:4-10)

Whats up!

I have been so terrible at keeping up with my blogs... shame on me... I have just been doing things with my husband and learning to live with each other again. Hasnt been an easy task but hey nothing worthwhile in life is easy. Great things take work! I love having my hubby at home.. he hasnt went back to work yet. He is currently receiving treatment for his back.. He slipped off the back of a vehicle in Afghanistan and they told him he was having muscle spasms and then he comes home and he has 3 bulging disks in his lower back.. NICE right!! Sigh... Gotta love the military. Right now he is doing physical therapy then they will do another evaluation and see if he needs any further therapy or at worst surgery... =( I have some wonderful news but I am going to wait to let the cat outta the bag at a later time. Not now!! HAHA!! Ive gotta keep you guys coming back. This past Labor day weekend we went to the lake with some family and close friends and we had a blast. Food, fun, water and fellowship is always great. I even rode a jetski!! Lets just say Full speed + goofing off = epic fail!! Yeah I was trying to wiggle the jetski back and forth and it hit a wake and the jet ski went one way and I went another! LOL! Definitely feel like I got some whiplast off that one!! Its the price you pay for lots of fun! Babygirl and Bubba are loving school. I had Bubba in a private church preschool and I felt like I should be contributing to my church home so I moved him to the preschool where I am a member at. He likes it. Its a good thing he has been there before because the transition could have gone alot harder than what it did. We have also put Bubba in karate. I am hoping it helps him with some self control and his behavior. He isnt a bad kid but he is a busy busy boy. Babygirl starts cheerleading on Monday! I am so excited!! Buttercup doesnt have much going on.. She needs fto focus on growing some more hair so I can put it up in pigtails and stuff! I am still playin Wow.. My playing has slowed down a bit since Big Papa has been home which is understandable.. I am almost to the highest level. Cant wait to get up there and do heroics and things like that! I am also contemplating on going back to school.. been thinking about being an Occupational Thereapis for children with Autism or other disabilities like that. What do YOU think??  =) As far as everything else its going great. I am so ready for this weekend. Hubby and I have a little rendevous planned this weekend he is gonna LOVE IT! Actually I am gonna love it too!! He He! Well thats pretty much all thats going on nowadays. Hope everyone has a wonderful Wednesday!!!!